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Revisiting Sheryl Crow’s Bond theme for Tomorrow Never Dies

As Sheryl Crow’s become a sultry sexagenarian…

A smidgeon less than deadly, despite the Bondian twangy guitar in the chorus not even Sheryl Crow’s best Gwen Stefani impression can save this whiny, forgettable cut, which was chosen over offerings from the likes of Pulp, Saint Etienne and, criminally, the demoted but far superior Surrender by k.d. lang.

In fact, the singer’s contribution to the spy series is notable only for how it underscores the fact that most Bond themes — notably the ones performed by women — are sung from the perspective of a neglected lover, dolled up and desperately waiting by the door for 007 to come home. 

The American country-pop queen, who made her name as a backing vocalist on Michael Jackson‘s Bad tour, wrote the song without seeing a rough cut of the movie and it shows.

Her first words here are especially pitiable: “Darling/I’m killed/I’m in a puddle on the floor/Waiting for you to return.”

And return James Bond always does, but rarely to the same girl, especially if she’s become just a little toothless old wad of gum on the floor.

Still, Crow scored a fair-sized hit in Britain (entering and peaking at No. 12 the week the Teletubbies knocked the BBC‘s all-star reimagining of Lou Reed‘s Perfect Day off its throne), but in the US the tune ended up as one of the unlucky nominees to go up against Celine Dion’s tawdry Titanic theme at both the Grammys and the Golden Globes.

Props for getting a Martini into the lyrics though, my dear.

Steve Pafford

Adapted from For your ears only: all 30 Bond themes ranked from worst to best here

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